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Rushed Kitchen Recordings: Vol. 2

by Erich with an H

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1.
Toys (Demo) 03:14
Men who love toys Who love toys Who love toys That make noise Are silly boys Men who build bombs And shoot guns Never want anyone To tell them not to have fun They giggle and they run It’s so much fun Jumping over bodies Rotting in the sun And it’s getting harder every day To ignore them When they go outside to play Men who spew hate Who spew hate Always sulk and say They didn’t mean it that way They skin their knees Skin their knees Skin their knees And cry While bodies swing from trees They sputter and they spit And suck their thumbs Running home to daddy With his loaded gun Nothing’s getting better While we think and pray With fingers crossed on one hand The other waving pain away There’s no place to rest Here on sinking sand If you want to help you better Raise your hand Men who love toys That make noise Have been told That the world is theirs To enjoy Responsibility is king Until you sacrifice the pawn And pass the buck into The pocket Of the ones Who love the toys of little boys Because it gives them all the Money to buy toys that they enjoy They don’t smell the sick decay Of the souls that melt away ‘Til there’s nothing left but pain End the drought and bring the rain We can’t wait for them to change When there’s money to be made From selling hate So it’s time to break the toys And make some noise
2.
I was floating in the water I was buried in the sand Always planning for tomorrow Always reaching for your hand Keep my feet shoulder width apart So you know just where I stand, and So that you can always find me You were busy buying postcards Photos of exotic lands Always scanning the horizon Always making other plans to Take a trip to the last resort Where you’d slip right through my hands Now I help plan your vacation from me I help plan your vacation from me Hide myself inside the glove box Trying to hitch a ride Tuck myself behind the driver’s side Nothing I can do to stop you So I help you pack Count your clothes to see how long Until you're coming back Now I’m waiting for your postcards Sent from somewhere far away Dreaming of a better future Thinking back on yesterday And all the mistakes I made starting Long before the day I helped plan your vacation from me Now there’s nowhere else I’d rather be than helping Plan your next vacation from me
3.
It’s a scene Down on Engelstrasse 313 Everybody’s gathered round the screen To see the latest From the German horror queen She can play Every single part that comes her way Everybody’s got a different fave It’s so hard to choose From all of her iconic roles And oh I don’t Know just what I did before the day She appeared on my TV screen A signal sent from somewhere far away Her name is Alice Grüvy Have you seen her in the movie Where she plays the nun who Sold her mortal soul In exchange for a haunted mirror That reflects her greatest fear? It was the film that made her name in ‘68 Critics said that she’d go far Though her films are quite bizarre Es ist klar dass sie ist ein superstar After school I flew across the swirling sea To spend some time in Germany Living in a repertory kino practically I met a group of fellow movie fans Moved in with a guy named Hans Obsessed with Alice just as much as me Oh, how we clapped and cheered Each time that she appeared We’d talk about her films 'til dawn And argue in a haze of smoke and beer Her name is Alice Grüvy You must have seen the movie Where she’s running from a horde Of undead zombie children so She hides in a museum Just in time to see them Swallowed up into a fog Conjured by a talking dog Who represents the lingering effects of war upon the European Union We woke up in early May To hear that Alice passed away It was the saddest day Her name was Alice Grüvy I’ve seen all the movies That she made before she died Es tut mir leid It’s a scene Down on Engelstrasse 313 Everybody’s gathered round the screen So they can say goodbye to horror’s fallen queen And the tears Falling to the floor like rain Everybody mouths her name At the moment that her casket’s Lowered out of frame Her name was Alice Grüvy To those who loved her truly In films like “Das Verfluchte Blut” And “Schattengeisterburg” It’s a shame she never was embraced Or took her rightful place In the upper echelon Of the horror pantheon Where she belongs Es ist klar dass Sie war ein superstar!
4.
Wrote a letter to myself Put it high up on a shelf Fell into a crack Where mice and spiders live Now I wait for your reply To a letter that I never ever Meant for you to read Until July I sent it to you by airmail Do you Dream about me too? Did you get my airmail, honey? I still Hope that I Still get to you Hiding in the bushes green Where I’m waiting to be seen In the mailbox where I’m Fading into view Haven’t seen a lick of news Check the bottom of my shoes For a scrap of holy paper I can use I’ll send it to you by airmail Do you Dream about me too? Did you get my airmail, honey I still Hope that I Still get to you Folded up in a paper coffin Sealed with toxic glue Hope you got my airmail momma Cause I wanna Send it back to you I wanna see you there In your overwear Tucked into My cursive missive Borne by winds across The ocean blue Fly to you Fly to you My airmail Fly to somewhere Someone Something new
5.
I want to see you Robin’s egg blue In a castle in the sky Fragile holder On a roll toward the Uneventful finished line When it’s over Turn my shoulder On the colored pieces All the pieces of the Robin’s egg blue Broken in two By design Ragged continents Are ripped apart by time Like the Robin’s egg blue I made for you With my mind Strand by strand we Build a nest of mud and straw And raw humanity Hold the robin’s gift to you Deep inside a silver bell Wrapped around the folded Paper shell of a Robin’s egg blue Broken in two Once it was new then it Hatched in my mind Flew into the frozen sky When it landed it was Just too hard to find Robin’s egg blue Broken in two Broken for you Left it just where you would find Now it’s broken Wide open And no one seems to mind
6.
We climb Ladders in the sky Until we lose our fear of heights And I Ride shadows in the sky Until I reach the speed of light I was sitting by the seaside singing About my secret shame For a minute everybody knew me Success is happiness That lasts a moment then it’s already gone And if I had to guess I’d say our problem taking flight Is we can’t cure our fear of heights Our fear of heights Sometimes I dream that I Will be lifted up on shoulders way up high When I Step up to the mic And sing about the things I want to hide I was sitting by the seaside swimming In the ocean waves Success is happiness That lasts a moment then it’s already gone And if I had to guess I’d say our problem taking flight Is we can’t cure our fear of Success Happiness is just a moment in time And if I had to guess I’d say our problem taking flight Is we can’t cure our fear of heights Our fear of heights Our fear of Pick me up and carry me and cure my fear of My fear of heights My fear of
7.
Don’t. Don’t be dyin’ When you’re out there on the road If you do then I’ll be cryin’ I think my heart just might explode Then I could be the subject of That true crime podcast that you love I wanna see you In the sunshine On your feet and feeling fine Don’t wanna see you Underneath the ground Without a heartbeat to be found Do. Do be drivin’ To the ocean far away In the water we’ll be divin’ Wanna see you splash and play Stay above the crashing waves So I don’t have to save the day I wanna see you Dancing in the night Just don’t step into the light I wanna see you Up there on the screen In your cautionary scene Don’t be dyin’ Don’t be dyin’
8.
It started like a thousand times before Walking up the path to knock on your front door But I knew that something wasn’t right I could tell by the quiet And the missing porch light I don’t mind the wait She’s already gone I should be moving on It was a planned escape I fill in the hole Cause I don’t want to go I know it’s getting late But I’ll wait Guess I should have seen the early warning signs On my expeditions down abandoned mines She left me with no forwarding address Now I'm standing at the window staring into darkness I don’t mind the wait She’s already gone I should be moving on It’s a sad mistake Rolling back the days To just before the haze I know it’s getting late But I’ll wait Until the summer comes When the night is running late I sit and watch the shadows fall From the house across the street To beyond the garden gate I don’t mind the wait She’s already gone I could be moving on It was the saddest day I fell in a hole And I don't want to go I know it’s getting late But I’ll wait
9.
There’s a sign on the wall That I can’t read at all Because the writing’s too small It says, “Catch me if I fall” So I reach out and watch it slip right through Watch your heart explode Like a bucket of toads Dumped out on the road From the back of a motor home. You reach for the pills. I see them spill Little seeds of doubt Strewn about the room Want to see you grow old. Have what you hold Not forget your name Or become some smoke that once was a flame. I reach out then I reach out then I reach out then for you I reach out then I reach out then I reach out then for you For you Will you?
10.
Kids are standing in a line Whisper secrets to a man In clothes as red as wine One at a time Snow is coming down in piles Like styrofoam in boxes Tattooed with little smiles In the style ‘Tis the season Glowing trees and Buying wreaths that no one needs Grab the keys and Let the breeze in Turn the engine over In the cold night air Of holidays long gone Outside carolers in song Grab a cookie from the tray Too soon and burn my tongue We sing along ‘Tis the season Glowing trees and Buying wreaths that no one needs Grab the keys and Let the breeze in Turn the engine over In the cold night air Of holidays long gone Holidays long gone Long gone
11.
I hear the bells Ringing out across the hills In a movie on TV The signal goes Now the frame is filled with snow Deep enough to bury me Sit in the glow Of a pre-lit tree, although The timer’s just about to trip Last year tonight I held you tight But then my fingers slipped All the festivities Bring me to my knees Wassail tastes like brine And the green turns to blue Without you Now I’m sitting by the phone At Christmastime I am sitting by the phone Swipe the screen Just enough to keep it clean Or until the battery dies In sweatpants I watch the three dot dance On the stage before my eyes In the city of light It’s always night Carol echoes in my mind No more shopping to do Without you I wander through the streets At Christmastime I wander through the streets Like a gift without a name Can’t believe it’s still the same World that once had you and me Traditions come and go Like the melting salted snow From the tears that freely flow Find the last melted sweet Too soft to eat Hidden in a stocking toe In the attic upstairs We never shared Packed in boxes stacked to go One final poem To pen and then I’ll go Soon as I (can) find the rhyme And the moon’s shining bright This late December night Casting shadows on the snow At Christmastime Moving pictures on the snow At Christmastime At Christmastime At Christmastime
12.
Once I walked alone Where there was no road I was freezing Then I noticed you Standing on the roof For some reason And I heard you call me home Smoke in the starry sky Spoke of hearts on fire In the city Where a million lights Dazzle passing flights It’s a pity ‘Cause no one’s going home Home is a long way I’m coming to stay I hear you call me home Home is a long way I’m coming to stay I hear you call me home Climb down the mountainside Carry all my pride In a folder There, in the mountain air See the falling hair Round your shoulders Welcome me back home Home is a long way I’m coming to stay I hear you call me home I hear you call me home
13.
Sitting in my fridge I got a hunk of moldy cheese People keep on telling me That’s how it’s s’posed to be I got the bleu I got the bleu cheese blues Bought that block of cheese The day my baby went away Since then it and I keep Getting older every day I got the bleu Bleu bleu bleu cheese blues Sometimes things go downhill and Sometimes they improve I got those bleu Bleu cheese blues I’ve been riding with that woman For a million miles Can’t tell if we’re rusted thru Or if we’re riding high I’m split in two Like the avenue Sometimes time goes faster Sometime it barely moves I got the bleu Bleu bleu bleu cheese blues Nevermind the wrinkles Or the hair that’s going gray Just because it’s moldy Doesn’t mean we shouldn’t save What’s true Between me and you Sometimes things are rough Sometimes they’re nice and smooth I got those bleu Bleu bleu bleu cheese blues Bleu cheese Can’t tell if it’s going bad Bleu cheese Tears make it taste so sad Bleu cheese Sitting on my plate, well I checked the date and It’s getting too late But I still think we should Try it Try it Some have everything to gain and Some have none to lose Some things age, some things rot You gotta choose Sometimes cheese tastes better When it smells like stinky shoes I got the bleu Bleu bleu bleu cheese blues I got the bleu cheese blues I got the bleu cheese blues
14.
When I Slip into the darkened room I try To move through the air as Quietly as I can You see. You Fold yourself into bed before I do Falling away from feeling Nevertheless you stir Sit up as if to speak Tell me to stay right where I am It’s just another night of subsconscious Terrors to haunt you and I know That I’m gonna have to talk you down From the highest high to the lowest ground It’s a wonder that I stick around When you just can’t seem to stay Underground Now I'm Bracing myself for incoherent Speech Mostly about the spiders Coming down from the Ceiling, they’re falling Crawling and I Let out a scream Cause I’m gonna have to Talk you down From the highest high To the lowest ground It’s a wonder that I stick around When you just can’t seem to stay Underground And I don’t mind It might be cute At other times Talking in your sleep is fine Still I Don’t always play along and you Can tell Down through the endless fog You sense my coldness Sigh in frustration Tell me that you know What you are saying It doesn’t matter if I believe. You Fall back against the pillow Now I’m gonna have to talk you down From the highest high to the lowest ground It’s a wonder that I stick around When you just can’t seem to stay And I’m gonna have to talk you down From the highest high To the lowest ground It’s a wonder that I stick around When you just can’t seem to stay Underground
15.
You broke my eyes Sitting here blind Trying to make up your mind You make me pay to Keep my nam Hang me in a plastic frame It’s a new year rising See what we can do And I’m on the horizon Looking for the view Fans blow cold The falling snow A crack at night leaves me Awake and alone A fading dream This frozen machine I can’t remember chords I wrote in between It’s a new year rising. See what we can do And I’m on the horizon, looking for the view Find the purpose that’s only mine Will I be, more of me in time? It’s a new year rising. See what you can do And I’m on the horizon, looking for the view
16.
Anna, Anna, no one should be alone Anna, Anna, sitting on the telephone Humming the tone. Waiting at home I used to think that time was a machine Now I know it's just another place to set a scene No one’s playing opposite you in a leading role And no one’s there to hold your hand and help your hurting soul Oh oh no Anna, Anna, pack your bags and go Make a plan to, gather seeds that you will sow Ready to blow. You're gonna glow I used to think that time was a machine Now I know it's just a way to keep your feathers clean Drove by your house and saw your junk mail piled way up high So glad to see you won your own lifetime supply of life No more lonely nights
17.
NYC (Demo) 02:47
I want to be here in NYC By which I mean to be Near You Completely Is what I want to be By train By car Doesn’t matter because That’s where You are In the vicinity Of a place called NYC Faded photo That doesn’t look like me Long time ago In a marble-colored dream In a room in NYC Hand on the wheel And I’ll keep it there until I have made it out to see You at the side Of the road Will not divide On the way from you to me In good old NYC I want to be Here in NYC By which I mean That I Need You Completely Right here in NYC Right here in NYC Right here in NYC
18.
Looking backward ‘til I see the past Spine is cracking like a broken mast In between I see a hundred million particles float past That make a long life feel that much longer Sort it all by what to throw away ‘Cause what I keep won’t take up any space Feel the breeze from swaying stacks of photos sliding off the tray Into unintentional collages hung up on display I hold on to the feeling that feels like yesterday when I saw Slip shadow Falling on the window pane Slip shadow In the pouring rain And I’d do it all again Slip shadow Write another song to play Slip shadow Melody in gray on a hazy holiday It was over ‘fore I caught the time Broke my fingers digging for a dime Tears were flowing in a dried up creek bed Freely offered my biggest regret as an open secret Slip shadow Falling on the window shade Slip shadow In the freezing rain And I’d do it all again Slip shadow Write another song to play Slip shadow Memories in gray at the edges of a hazy holiday
19.
Here's what it is to live on stage: Open the door of an unlocked cage Stand in the spotlight all alone Burning flesh and bone Finally at home Sailing at night on an unlit sea Guided by wind and memory Crashing through waves and heading for An unseen unknown shore A land worth fighting for And you're all that I was waiting for Tracing the arc of a soaring crow Contours of shadows in stubborn snow Cresting the tallest hill to find Another hill to climb High above your mind
20.
I saw, saw your video I saw, saw your head hung low I know it’s much lighter Than it should be It’s time, take your medicine It’s time, time to let me in I know it’s not about me, but I miss your style You turn to me and know you're always on my mind I want to be kind And I’m Happy for the boy, come back home again Happy for the boy, feel all right again Don’t you worry, boy Even though you feeling like it’s been such a long time You’ve got a long time left with me I’m hap, happy for the good boy Hap, hap, happy for the good boy Still got photos of you when You were so much different then Now, I see time isn’t stopping At least not for me You sit in a special place You’re all, always in my face, but there’s No place in our little world I’d rather be I turn toward you and I know you will be there Just like tomorrow, and I’m Happy for the boy, come back home again Happy for the boy, feeling strong again Don’t you worry, boy Even though you feel like it’s been such a long time You’ve got a long time left with me Up against my knee Sounds I cannot see Boy, your good vibration’s all I need I’m hap, happy for the good boy Hap, hap, happy for the good boy

about

Why release two albums' of demos before releasing finished versions of the songs? Look... professional-quality home recording is hard. If I took the time to produce these songs with the loving care they deserve, my first album would be posthumous. So you get this instead.

Most of these demos were recorded right after I finished writing the songs. All but a few were recorded in one take, on my phone, so I wouldn't forget how to play it. As a working musician, I've performed (most of) these songs dozens of times in live shows. I know them well. It's strange to go back to these original demos because I rarely get it just right on the first try. The songs have changed. I sing them a little differently now. Some of the words have changed. You may discover those changes in the lyrics I've included, because I'm not going to go through and check that they match. I find those differences fascinating. I doubt anyone else will notice or care. But hey, that's art.

Is releasing this collection a good idea? Who knows, but it's somehow fitting that I'm putting these out as quickly and with as little care as I put into the original recordings. Case in point, I copied and pasted the entire write-up from Vol. 1 except for this sentence. Did you bother to read both? I assume not, and I didn't expect you to.

Enjoy.

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released March 20, 2020

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Erich with an H New York

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